One More Day!

I can't wait for this election to be over.

Elections in Louisiana are especially savage. The ads are unbelievable - with both sides calling the other side immoral, criminal, and without any sense of right and wrong. If it were only mud they were slinging!

I'm tired of all of it, and am glad we only go through this ritual once in a while. If only elections were held every 25 years! I was speaking to a fellow Lutheran pastor the other day, and he was emphatic that he can't wait for it to be over as well, as his Bible class simply devolves into a discussion of partisan politics.

This year, more than ever, we have had threats of bloodshed and riots if one side loses. We've also seen widely reported hate-crime accusation (later proven to be a hoax) trying to link one side to an act of politically-motivated violence. We've heard charges and countercharges. I have never seen so much disinformation in my e-mail inbox. People are eager to believe any scrap of ill-repute, any bit of dirt, no matter how ridiculous or obviously untrue - if it can be used to destroy and trash the reputation of the person on the other side. They're usually laden with misspelled words, capital letters, and different colors - followed by ten or twelve exclamation points:

"DID YOU NO THAT [candidate x] IS A [whatever]?!!!!!!!!! Please forward this to everone in your address book!!!!!!!!"

This year in particular, flame has been stoked by a double dose of gasoline based on race and sex in addition to the usual sense of urgency that "our" guy/gal win - or else.

The Christian responses to the current slate have been illuminating.

I have heard some say that abstaining from voting is a sin. I have heard others say that voting for one political party is a sin, while other Christians claim that voting for the opposite party is a sin. The specter of legalized abortion looms large, as some argue that this issue makes the role of the voter easy: you don't need to "worry your pretty little head" about anything complicated like economics, national security, the Constitution, the relationship between the state and federal governments, fiscal policy, taxation, or foreign policy (as well as issues important to Louisiana, such as the critical life-and-death issues as coastland restoration, hurricane preparedness, and levee rebuilding projects). Instead, you just look for the Republican label and/or a promise to be against abortion - then cast your vote accordingly. Bada-bing, bada-boom.

Of course, there is much more to being pro-life than simply being anti-abortion. There are ethical questions about genetic experimentation, stem cell research, euthanasia, the care of the elderly, questions about captial punishment and its implementation, matters of war and when it is just, the teaching and distribution of birth control in public schools, etc.

And there are indeed nine other commandments besides the fifth. Furthermore, there are "pro-lifers" who are okay with abortion (infanticide) if the mother was raped, or if the poor child is the product of incest. There are some "pro-lifers" who are okay with using dead babies for parts to experiment on under the guise of "stem-cell research." There are some pro-abortion folks who are against "partial birth abortion" and some who believe the parents of minor girls seeking abortion should be notified. Some would restrict abortion to the first trimester. And there are people on both sides who rightly understand that this is not a federal issue at all, and the entire issue ought to be returned to the states individually, as the Constitution makes no provision to empower Congress authority over abortion or the Supreme Court the power to legislate from the bench.

So, I do believe Christians indeed need to "worry their pretty little heads" about much more than the promise of a candidate to be against abortion - even when pro-life issues are at the top of one's list - as they should be. The question is a lot more nuanced than just the label "pro-life." And we ought to have a healthy skepticism of even those who claim the label in the heat of an election. Do their past statements and voting records match the rhetoric?

There is also the consideration that Roe v. Wade can indeed be abolished by Congress without the Supreme Court's (and therefore the Executive Branch's) help. Bills to carry this out have been languishing in committee since 2005, even when the Republican Party controlled both houses and the presidency (with only five sponsors). Of course, infanticide and other forms of legal murder will continue as long as we live in a culture of death. Politics has its place in the culture and in the drafting of pro-life laws, but I fear that too many Christians see government as a be all and end all in the promotion of God's Kingdom and a culture of life. We are warned about putting our trust in princes.

There is also the problem that many of my northern friends don't understand why every Christian just doesn't vote a straight Republican ticket. They seem utterly incredulous when I explain that in Dixie, we sometimes have the choice between a pro-life (and/or conservative) Democrat and a pro-abortion (and/or liberal) Republican. Other times, there is no Republican (or pro-life Democrat) to vote for. By way of example, our most beloved arch-conservative law-and-order Jefferson Parish Sheriff, the late Harry Lee, was a lifelong Democrat. You would be hard pressed to find any Republicans to vote against him, let alone run against him. If I remember right, he had a picture of himself with President Reagan hanging in his office. You would be hard pressed to find such things in other regions of the country.

In my congressional district, in tomorrow's election, we can choose between the moderately pro-life Democrat Bill Jefferson, and his challenger, fellow Democrat Helena Moreno. The Right to Life organization reports that Moreno did not return the questionnaire on abortion. Her website is silent on the issue. When I called her campaign office to ask her position on abortion, one of her workers said that she wasn't sure, but offered that Moreno's opponent (Bill Jefferson) was "pro-life." Helena Moreno seems to be ducking the issue, though she simultaneously seems to be courting conservative votes.

So, even though both candidates are Democrat, the easy choice seems to be to vote for Jefferson. That is, until you consider that he is under federal indictment for having $90,000 in bribe cash in his freezer when the FBI raided his home (not to mention a recent money laundering case that involved Jefferson as well as a now-jailed former state senator, who, by the way was also pro-life). Several members of Jefferson's family are now in prison as a result of this same case. "Dollar" Bill has also been stripped of all of his seniority and committee leadership in Congress, and is, to say the least, damaged goods.

The "single issue" issue isn't so single after all.

So, some would tell me to vote for "Dollar Bill" (in spite of the mountain of corruption) as the "lesser of two evils" because he is pro-life. Some would call it a sin to vote for any Democrat - even one who is considered by many to be a fiscal conservative like Moreno (although the only two candidates on the ballot in the general election in our district are both Democrats). Some would say it is a sin not to vote for either one (especially because the polls are very close, and not voting for either one would be "wasting my vote"). So, no matter what I do, I'm sinning in someone's book. In some people's minds, just being over 18 and alive in Louisiana's Congressional District 2 is a sin - no matter if you vote for one, the other, or if you abstain.

It's not so easy.

Then there's the U.S. Senate catfight between Democrat Sen. Mary Landrieu (pro-abortion Democrat) and Republican challenger State Treasurer John Kennedy (pro-life Republican). This one looks like a slam dunk, right? But both candidates have some really shady issues dogging them, and, to complicate matters, several prominent Republicans are crossing party lines and endorsing Landrieu.

A few years ago, a lot of conservative and Christian Louisianians voted for Democrat Edwin Edwards for governor (knowing he was crooked - as today he has another few years to serve of his ten-year sentence for corruption) over conservative pro-life Republican David Duke - who perhaps would have been a slam-dunk for conservative Christians were it not for that matter of less importance than abortion that he was a former Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan - which became a bit of a monkey wrench for "single issue voters" who want to bury their heads in the sand on every issue other than abortion.

These kinds of strange political situations (such as conservative Democrats, liberal Republicans, two Democrats on the ballot, Republicans endorsing Democrats, Democrats endorsing Republicans, and Democrats and Republicans trading the pinstripe suits for striped pajamas) are rare in the North, but are rather common in the South - especially in Louisiana (and are to some extent part of the long-term fallout of the political corruption our state had to endure during Reconstruction - thanks a lot, Yankee Republicans!) . If you want a "plug and chug, no thinking" approach to voting, move to someplace cold. If you look out your window and see palm trees and/or a grown man in a pirate outfit or last year's Mardi Gras beads dangling from a tree, or you can hear a band playing accordions and washboards and singing in unintelligible French - you will not have such simple choices.

And in some respects, that's a good thing.

Lousianians learn in a hurry not to put their trust in princes, to be healthily skeptical of politicians (regardless of their party label), to think about all the issues, and to know when it is appropriate not to vote for any of them, to hit the drive-thru daiquiri shop instead of the voting booth. You learn to appreciate the Times-Picayune's equal opportunity bashing of the candidates, and to have less patience with the mainstream media - be it the commie C** or the fascist F** News Networks - all shills, the lot of them. We have local talk radio that will heap scorn on both Republicans and Democrats rather than serve as propagandistic mouthpieces of either the Evil Party or the Stupid Party (and I'll let you, the reader, decide which is which).

Being from Lousiana, and having had my fill of the year of campaigns and nonsense, I also have a genuine desire to declare the first Wednesday in November to be a holiday. I want a parade, and we can all dress up like Guy Fawkes and wave "Don't Tread On Me" banners in between catching stuffed animals (and no elephants and donkeys either!) from the guy dressed up like a pirate. That fellow makes more sense to me than most of the dopes, shills, and criminals we have in Baton Rouge and in Washington.

This too shall pass - though as usual, like a kidney stone.