American Royalty and a Missed Opportunity

No wonder people spend millions of dollars making promises they could never keep to the American people  in order to become president and first lady, or should we say king and queen of America.  It's a pretty good gig!

I would love to be there for pizza with His Royal Highness in Detroit next Wednesday, but I'm having the oil changed in my Learjet that day, and I'm also expecting Bill Gates and the Sultan of Brunei over for beanie-weenies served on solid platinum saucers.  I do hope somebody is bringing the Dom Perignon, especially after I just bought brand new matching tumblers from WalMart (Biden tipped me off about the rollback...).

Ah, what is a good American to do?  I'm so disappointed.

Note to self: be sure to have regrets sent engraved by hand on solid gold plates and delivered by the butler as soon as he returns from the French Riviera (good help is so hard to find these days).