A Cautionary Tale from Australia

Here is a sad story that has become so common that it defines an entire generation of women, not only in Australia, but around the world. We are only now beginning to feel the effect of the social, economic, and spiritual ripples of the radical reordering of society over the last generation.




The sins of our feminist mothers

By Virginia Haussegger
July 23 2002

A few years ago, in my mid-30s, had I heard Malcolm Turnbull pontificate about the need to encourage Australians to marry younger and have more children ("The crisis is fertility, not ageing", on this page last Tuesday), I would have thumped him, kneed him in the groin, and bawled him out.

How dare he - a rich father of two, with perfect wife and perfect life - presume for a moment to tell women, thriving at the peak of our careers, that we should stop, marry, and procreate. The sheer audacity of it.

Yet another male conspiracy, a conservative attempt to dump women out of the workplace and back into the home. A neat male arrangement: a good woman to run the household, and a workplace less cluttered with female competition.

A win-win for patriarchy. And precisely the kind of society I was schooled against.

As we worked our way through high school and university in the '70s and early '80s, girls like me listened to our mothers, our trailblazing feminist teachers, and the outspoken women who demanded a better deal for all women. They paved the way for us to have rich careers.

They anointed us and encouraged us to take it all. We had the right to be editors, paediatricians, engineers, premiers, executive producers, High Court judges, CEOs etc. We were brought up to believe that the world was ours. We could be and do whatever we pleased.

Feminism's hard-fought battles had borne fruit. And it was ours for the taking.

Or so we thought - until the lie of super "you-can-have-it-all" feminism hits home, in a very personal and emotional way.

We are the ones, now in our late 30s and early 40s, who are suddenly sitting before a sheepish doctor listening to the words: "Well, I'm sorry, but you may have left your run too late. Women at your age find it very difficult to get pregnant naturally, and unfortunately the success rate of IVF for a 39-year-old is around one in five - and dropping. In another 12 months you'll only have a 6 per cent chance of having a baby. So given all the effort and expense, do you really want to go through with this? Why don't you go home and think it through? But don't leave it too long - your clock is ticking." Then he adds for comic value, "And don't forget, the battery is running low!"

For those of us who listened to our feminist foremothers' encouragement; waved the purple scarves at their rallies; read about and applauded the likes of Anne Summers, Kate Jennings, Wendy McCarthy, Jocelyn Scutt, Morag Fraser, Joan Kirner, Elizabeth Proust etc (all strong examples of successful working women); for those of us who took all that on board and forged ahead, crashed through barriers and carved out good, successful and even some brilliant careers; we're now left - many of us at least - as premature "empty nesters".

We're alone, childless, many of us partnerless, or drifting along in "permanent temporariness", as sociologist Zygmunt Bauman so aptly put it in a recent Age article by Anne Manne to describe the somewhat ambiguous, uncommitted type of relationship that seems to dominate among childless, professional couples in their 30s and 40s.

The point is that while encouraging women in the '70s and '80s to reach for the sky, none of our purple-clad, feminist mothers thought to tell us the truth about the biological clock. Our biological clock. The one that would eventually reach exploding point inside us.

Maybe they didn't think to tell us, because they never heard the clock's screaming chime. They were all married and knocked-up by their mid-20s. They so desperately didn't want the same for us.

And none of our mothers thought to warn us that we would need to stop, take time out and learn to nurture our partnerships and relationships. Or if they did, we were running too fast to hear it.

For those of us that did marry, marriage was perhaps akin to an accessory. And in our high-disposable-income lives, accessories pass their use-by date, and are thoughtlessly tossed aside. Frankly, the dominant message was to not let our man, or any man for that matter, get in the way of career and our own personal progress.

The end result: here we are, supposedly "having it all" as we edge 40; excellent education; good qualifications; great jobs; fast-moving careers; good incomes; and many of us own the trendy little inner-city pad we live in. It's a nice caffe-latte kind of life, really.

But the truth is - for me at least - the career is no longer a challenge, the lifestyle trappings are joyless (the latest Collette Dinnigan frock looks pretty silly on a near-40-year-old), and the point of it all seems, well, pointless.

I am childless and I am angry. Angry that I was so foolish to take the word of my feminist mothers as gospel. Angry that I was daft enough to believe female fulfilment came with a leather briefcase.

It was wrong. It was crap. And Malcolm Turnbull has a point. God forbid!

Virginia Haussegger is ABC TV news presenter in the ACT. She has been a television journalist for 15 years, hosting the 7.30 Report in various states and reporting for the Channel Seven's Witness and Channel Nine's A Current Affair

Friends on Facebook

Just a PSA from your friendly neighborhood Father Hollywood...

I hope nobody feels snubbed, but I don't respond to the e-mails I get when people add me as friends on Facebook. I just don't have the time to get wrapped up in one more thing on the computer. I know I have a Facebook profile out there, but I just never look at it.

I also have a MySpace floating around out there that I don't read. I have been able to reconnect with old friends thanks to my MySpace page, but once again, I can't even remember the last time I actually signed on.

So, if you've extended me an invitation and I didn't respond, please don't interpret it as a snub. Who knows? Maybe I'll change my mind at some point. But for now, with teaching, tutoring, and serving as a sole pastor (not to mention my full time vocation as husband and father) - I'm spending time I don't really have just posting to my blog. I know what would happen if I started doing Facebook as well.

So please don't feel slighted. It's not that I'm ignoring you - I'm ignoring everyone. My ignorance is universal. Er, I don't think that came out quite right. ;-)

Sermon: Septuagesima

20 January 2008 at Salem Lutheran Church, Gretna, LA
Text: Matt 20:1-16

In the name of + Jesus. Amen.

Our Lord Jesus Christ teaches us about His Kingdom – which is not of this world – by way of the Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard.

In the kingdom of this world, we demand to be treated fairly. If we work twelve hours, we expect to be paid twelve times as much as the person who works one hour. In fact, we may even be entitled to time and a half for anything over eight hours. Our notion of equality demands equal pay for equal work. If we were to find out that a co-worker with less experience is making more money, we would likely demand a raise – feeling that we are entitled to make at least as much as the next person.

In the kingdom of this world, we have trade unions, discrimination laws, labor rules and regulations, and the right to sue when we feel we have been treated unfairly.

In the kingdom of this world, our Lord Jesus’s story sounds like a defense for crooked bosses, for mistreating workers, for sowing the seeds of dissent by paying the hardworking and the loyal the same salary as the lazy and shiftless.

In the kingdom of this world, God is a lousy boss and a terrible businessman.

But our Lord’s Kingdom is not of this world. God’s ways are not our ways. The owner of the vineyard is indeed not paying the laborers what they deserve – and thanks be to God! For the wages of sin is death.

In our Lord’s Kingdom, not getting what we deserve is not the cause of protest, but of praise. It is not the occasion of a lawsuit, but rather a cause of thanksgiving.

For the grumblers in our Lord’s parable confuse the two kingdoms. They expect the Kingdom of Heaven to work like the kingdom of this world. They see payment for their work to be owed to them. They see any good thing they possess as something they have earned. They see their salary as God’s payment to them for what they deserve.

Such a view of God’s Kingdom is without grace. For if God is only giving you what you have earned, He really isn’t giving you anything at all. If you have earned it, God owes it to you. And if God owes you some benefit, it places you in a position of collecting on the debt God owes you.

Such a view of the universe places the self over God. Such a view removes divine love from the picture and turns God into a payroll program that gets run on a computer.

Unfortunately, many people see God in this way. He is a giant calculator in the sky, the kind that prints debits in black and credits in red, and at the end of the day, they hope to have a balance sufficient to keep them out of hell.

But look at how God gives out the “wages.” Because He is good, because He gives mercy to those we have determined don’t deserve it, we think it is not “lawful” for God to do what He wishes with His things. And that is the problem. All things are God’s things. If He chooses to give to some but not others, it is not for us to tell Him how to distribute His gifts. If He chooses to pay the one who works for one hour in the cool of the shade the same wage as him who slaved all day in the blistering heat, who are we to question Him? Or are our eyes evil because He is good?

For in the kingdom of the world, the first is first, and the last is last. The race belongs to the swift. The gold medal goes to the strongest. The highest pay goes to the smartest and hardest working. The greatest accolades go to the most honorable. But God’s Kingdom is not of this world. His ways are not our ways. As our Lord sums up the parable: “The last will be first, and the first last.”

The Kingdom of God is a topsy-turvy Kingdom in which those who deserve to die are given life, those who have seemingly earned riches are poor, those who claim to have earned a high place in the Kingdom are overtaken by the humble, and those who come to the gates of the Kingdom with empty pockets are exulted.

For the Lord does not pay us the wages we deserve, for we deserve nothing but death and damnation. Rather He pays us the wages we don’t deserve, wages that aren’t really wages at all, but rather gifts – unearned grace.

For in God’s Kingdom, there is no room for self-aggrandizement and boasting. If you possess much in God’s Kingdom, it is because much has been given to you. If you are first, it is because you are last. Every time we draw a breath, it is by God’s grace. For not a single one of us deserves to live another second.

Those who have worked but a single hour in God’s Kingdom should rejoice in the kindness shown to them, that in spite of their short time of labor, the Lord has been generous to them. Those who have worked twelve hours in God’s Kingdom should rejoice in the kindness shown to them, that the Lord has granted them a long tenure of service in the great and glorious Kingdom – not for the reward of money, but rather for the simple joy of serving the great and mighty King of the universe, a joy which is every bit as unearned and undeserved as the full wages paid to those who worked only one hour.

The Gentiles ought to rejoice that God has given them a share in the Kingdom, even though they lack the family history and heritage that ties them to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. And the Jews ought to rejoice that they have been given the Scriptures, that they have been chosen as children of the Covenant, from whom the very Seed Himself would spring, to be a blessing to all those on earth.

Neither Jew nor Gentile has a boast in Himself, but both have a boast in receiving a place in God’s Kingdom though both do not deserve it.

God is not a calculator in the sky. Rather, He is the owner of all good things, who shares those good things with those whom He has called and chosen. He is the giver of gifts and dispenser of benefits, the One who cares for us out of divine love and mercy – not simply to pay a salary that is owed. For God is not the debtor, but rather we are debtors. And as we bid in the Lord’s Prayer: “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.” We whose trespasses have been forgiven should daily pray for God’s mercy, so that we should equally forgive those who trespass against us.

It is truly out of love that our Lord pays us not what we deserve, but rather gifts us with what we don’t deserve. We can either receive His gifts with thanksgiving, or we can grumble at those who likewise receive the same forgiveness. Our Lord Jesus teaches us that the Christian life is life in a Kingdom not of this world. In God’s Kingdom, when the Lord is not fair, we don’t file a complaint with the union or demand the government take action, rather we rejoice in the divine unfairness that pays us not the death we deserve, but rather the life that we could never earn.

Let us not allow our eye to become evil because He is good. Rather let us sing the praises of Him who graciously withholds the wages we have deserved and yet gives us the benefits and gifts that we do not deserve – both now and unto eternity. Amen.

In the name of the Father and of the + Son and of the Holy Spirit.” Amen.

I don't know why...

but this just creeps me out for some reason.



Man, the Seventies were just messed up.

[And yes, Barbara, I can hear you in the backround yelling "Yeah, but the Eighties rocked!" while holding up your limited edition AC/DC bic lighter. Let the reader understand.]

Interesting...

I don't know what the story on this is, but this YouTube video claims to be a woman studying preaching (homiletics) under a Missouri Synod pastor named Jim Gwaltney. The video is entitled "Marla L.'s Sermon."

Sermon: Baptism of our Lord

13 January 2008 at Salem Lutheran Church, Gretna, LA
Text: Matt 3:13-17 (Josh 3:1-3, 7-8, 13-17, 1 Cor 1:26-31)

In the name of + Jesus. Amen.

We baptized Christians are God’s chosen people. He has called us by name and we are His. Just as He is our Shepherd, we are His sheep. So what does it mean to be chosen of God?

In our epistle, St. Paul tells us: “God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise.” So, God’s chosen are “foolish.” The Greek word for foolish is “moros” – where our word “moron” comes from. In other words, God chooses us morons as a way to annoy the smart people. But Paul doesn’t stop there.

To be one of God’s chosen is to not only be foolish, but to be weak, base, and despised. God roots for the underdog, and so to be a Christian is to be in last place – at least in the eyes of the world. There is a great wisdom in the Lord’s choosing of the most unlikely people to be His own. God is making the point that we dare not rely upon our own smarts, our own strength, our own mettle, or our own popularity to gauge our standing before God. As one of Luther’s last writings proclaimed, we Christians are beggars. We have nothing to boast about – except “as it is written, ‘He who glories, let him glory in the Lord.’”

In selecting ancient nomadic sheep-herders to be His chosen people, God was making it clear that being chosen is a matter of grace. For God did not choose the richest people, the most civilized, the most scientifically advanced, the greatest builders, the most literate, or even the most religious. God simply selected a man named Abram from Mesopotamia and revealed Himself to this man and his descendants, promising them a land and a national identity – from which would come the Chosen One of the chosen people, the Christ, the Savior of the world. It was the Lord God that made Israel great, not vice versa. It was Israel that was on the receiving end of undeserved mercy, and not the other way around.

When our Lord chose to dwell among us in the flesh, He chose a very ordinary girl in the eyes of the world to become His mother. And yet, by God’s grace, she was extraordinary in her faith. God took the form of a baby laid in a manger stall, who grew up in humble circumstances, surrounded by people who were neither famous nor rich by the world’s standards.

And in His earthly ministry, the Lord called to Himself a collection of ministers who were quite a motley crew of misfits, men who failed miserably under pressure, who come off looking like cowards in the Gospel accounts. Our Lord preached and won converts from among the cast-offs of society – lepers and demoniacs, prostitutes and corrupt tax collectors, thieves and even terrorists. Our Lord chose the foolish, the weak, the base, and the despised to start His Church. And He did it to confound the overconfident, the self-satisfied, the smug, the self-righteous, and those admired in this world. For what is a better display of grace than for a person to be chosen whose unworthiness is laid bare for all to see? And what a better demonstration of grace than to deny the gift to those who, in the eyes of the world, deserve it?

Today the Church remembers the baptism of our Lord. God Himself stoops not only to take on human flesh, but to submit to a baptism He had no need of. Jesus willingly joins the ranks of the foolish, the weak, the base, and the despised by coming to a baptism designed for sinners. He allows an unworthy sinner to cleanse Him “to fulfill all righteousness.”

And this humility, this obedience, this submission to the Father’s will immediately precedes the revelation of Jesus’s divinity. For the Father claims His beloved Son, in whom He is well pleased, passing over the worlds kings, priests, generals, scholars, men of might, men of fame, and men of wealth to announce to the world that His true Son is this One who submits to a sinner’s baptism of repentance. The Holy Spirit descends on Him in the form of a dove, a common ordinary pigeon, the same ordinary bird that informed Noah that God and man were once more at peace. The Triune God is revealed to the world in a way that shows the Lord’s embrace of the lowly, His exaltation of the despised of this world.

For this Holy Baptism – both that of our Lord and of ours in the name of the Lord – likewise use something lowly: common water. Our Lord Jesus is not showered in rose petals or gold coins. Nor is He given a grand triumph or tribute. He is not bathed in precious oils or placed upon a regal throne. Instead, our Lord’s public ministry begins with a washing in river water among a sweaty crowd of ordinary people, sinful people, foolish, weak, base, and despised people. He is baptized by His cousin who is seen by the authorities as a rabble-rouser and a bit of a lunatic.

And though water is powerful – large amounts of it can turn turbines and generate huge amounts of power, it can surge in from the ocean to destroy entire regions of a land, and it can pound away at rocks, reducing them to sand over the course of time – baptismal water is, by worldly accounts, pretty weak. When Christians are baptized, it typically involves three little handfuls – a tiny amount of water that we claim is more powerful than any substance in the universe. The world looks at our claims regarding baptism, and thinks we are foolish, because a little water is weak, faith in such a thing is base in the eyes of the world, and we Christians are despised for believing it. And yet, look at the promise: salvation from sin and death, a restoration of perfection, of immortality, of communion with the Creator. Those three little handfuls dwarf the might of the Hoover dam, make a mockery of the devastation of Katrina’s storm surge, and in a single minute removes more sin than the ocean can wear down solid rock over the course of centuries.

God chooses “foolish things of this world” to reveal Himself – simple bread and wine, words spoken by a pastor, a few ounces of water poured on a baby’s head, and the proclamation of good news that the world considers foolish, weak, base, and despised.

This is how it is that St. Paul says: “When I am weak, then I am strong.” For in our weakness, we see the might of the hand of God (instead of our own strength). In our foolishness, we see God’s wisdom (instead of our own cleverness). In our baseness we see the Lord’s righteousness (instead of our own claim to uphold the law). In being despised, we see the Lord’s love and care (instead of relying on the world’s praise and adulation – which often come at the price of integrity).

Dear brothers and sisters, your baptism doesn’t seem like all that much – and that is exactly why it is so mighty, so holy, so rich in grace. Christian baptism is seen by the unbeliever as foolish, weak, base, and even despised – and that is exactly why we cling to it for dear life. Just as the Lord chose the Jordan River to be blessed by His Son’s presence, the water in baptismal fonts around the world has been chosen by God “to put to shame the things that are wise… to put to shame the things that are mighty.”

“But of Him you are in Christ Jesus, who became for us the wisdom from God – and righteousness and sanctification and redemption – that, as it is written, “He who glories, let him glory in the Lord.” Amen.

In the name of the Father and of the + Son and of the Holy Spirit.” Amen.

Sermon: Funeral of Violet F. Graf

12 January 2008 at Salem Lutheran Church, Gretna, LA
Text: John 10:27-29 (Isa 25:6-9, 1 Cor 15:51-57)

In the name of + Jesus. Amen.

The text of our reading of the Holy Gospel is one of the most comforting passages in all of Scripture. I read it to Violet the last time I visited her on this side of the grave. Jesus says:

“My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me. And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of My Father’s hand.”

Jesus describes His people as His “sheep.” We are His creatures, He cares for us just as any farmer looks after His animals. There is no doubt as to who our Shepherd is. In these three verses, Jesus says “Me” or “My” seven times.

In this passage, Jesus promises eternal life over and against death. And He promises that no-one is capable of snatching us away from our Shepherd’s hand. Even though it seems that death snatches our loved ones from us, notice the promise of our Lord – no-one can snatch any of us, His sheep, from Him.

Violet was, is, and always will be one of our Lord’s sheep. She knows the voice of her Lord. She listened intently to the Word of God. She heard the Lord Jesus place His name upon her way back on December 7, 1919, when that very Word of God was joined to water and poured upon her tiny infant head. Ever since that day, the Lord was Violet’s Shepherd, and she wants for nothing.

For nearly nine decades, this dear sheep heard the voice of her Shepherd. He fed her with the same devotion and affection that she fed her own animals. He defended and cared for her with the same steadfast love with which she lovingly tended her own children and grandchildren, nieces and nephews, and all those who enjoyed her company. Again and again Violet heard the Word of the Gospel, assurance from God Himself that her sins were forgiven, that she is an heir of the Kingdom, that her life is to be eternal and physically united with Him in the same way that Violet and her daughter Violet were always seen together, receiving the body and blood of our Lord side by side, in this very sanctuary.

What comfort to her family who mourns her loss at this time – her biological family as well as her extended church family here at Salem. Though it may look like Violet was snatched away by death, in reality Violet snatched life from the jaws of death by the grace of God her loving Father, by the blood of our Lord Jesus Christ, and by the power of the Holy Spirit.

For our Lord’s victory over death and the grave is Violet’s victory. The Lord’s resurrection to eternal life is Violet’s resurrection. For the promises of Jesus are Violet’s promises, just as they are the promises made good to all those who believe and are baptized.

Of course we mourn our loss. Death is painful, but its sting is short lived. For we have the promise of God in Scripture from St. Paul: “When this corruptible has put on incorruption, and this mortal has put on immortality, then shall be brought to pass the saying that is written: ‘Death is swallowed up in victory. O Death, where is your sting? O Hades, where is your victory?’”

This is the same promise spoken by the prophet Isaiah: “He will swallow up death forever, and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces.”

Jesus, by His own death, has destroyed death. By His own resurrection He has shown us the promise of our own resurrection. Our Lord rebuked the devil and conquered the death we deserve due to our sins. He has paid the price of those sins, and crushed the head of the ancient serpent. He has done this so that we might live, so that death, for the Christian, is nothing more than a slumber, a peaceful sleep, in which we wait to reopen our eyes, eyes that will never again know weeping, to see a new heaven and a new earth, creation made anew and made perfect.

And though we don’t like to wait, even this waiting is sanctified. For hear again the prophecy of Isaiah: “Behold, this is our God; we have waited for Him, and He will save us. This is the Lord; we have waited for Him; we will be glad and rejoice in His salvation.”

And so we wait, dear brothers and sisters. We wait in this life, though our dear sister Violet no longer must wait. We wait in this Vale of Tears while Violet will never again weep. We must endure aches, pains, sickness, sadness, and yes, even the mourning of death – while to Violet, death has lost its sting, and the wait is over.

But we do not wait alone. Our Lord remains with us, abides with us, shares Himself with us in His Word and in the Holy Supper. While we wait in this life, waiting for the Lord to return, waiting for creation to be made perfect, waiting for our joyful reunion with Violet and with all the saints, we can wait with joy and gladness, in thankfulness and praise, with assurance that this is not our home, but a greater and more glorious dwelling awaits us, His sheep, once we awake from our slumber.

These promises of God, these victories won by our Lord Jesus Christ, this blessed assurance given us in the Lord’s Supper is why we can pray with the hymnist:

And in its narrow chamber keep
My body safe in peaceful sleep
Until Thy reappearing.
And then from death awaken me,
That these mine eyes with joy may see,
O Son of God, Thy glorious face,
My Savior and my fount of grace,
Lord Jesus Christ, my prayer attend, my prayer attend,
And I will praise Thee without end.

Amen.

In the name of the Father and of the + Son and of the Holy Spirit.” Amen.

Emerging Luther?

The latest trend in the American religious scene is the Emerging Church Movement. It is largely a reaction against the phoniness of the Church Growth Movement and a bucking of the trend toward the megachurch.

Missouri Synod leaders - especially those engaged in youth ministry - are intrigued by the movement, and are not only trying to co-opt Emerging approaches to evangelism and worship, they are actively seeking leaders of this movement from outside Lutheran circles to instruct LCMS pastors and laity as to how to implement these methods in a Lutheran context. This is happening at the synodical, district, and local levels of our church body.

The LCMS sponsored a Youth Ministry symposia featuring noted Emergent Church Movement guru Dan Kimball:

“EMERGING FROM WHAT? EXPLORING MINISTRY WITH YOUNG ADULTS.” This year’s symposium will take a serious look at how the church can be in ministry with the post-high school, twenty-something young adult. Why do we lose so many? And why does no one seem to care? How can we engage them in the life of a congregation? And what is this “thing” that has come to be known as the “emerging church?” Dan Kimball, author of “The Emerging Church,” “Emerging Worship,” and “They Like Jesus But Not the Church,” will be the featured speaker for the conference. Dr. Joel Lehenbauer, Associate Director for the LCMS Commission on Theology and Church Relations will lend his theological expertise. The conference is slated for January 4-6, 2008 at the J.W. Marriott Hotel at the Galleria in Houston, Texas. Conference registration is just $200 and includes three meals. Housing is available at the J.W. Marriott for only $89 per night. A registration brochure mailing will arrive in congregations the first week in September.

Rev. Dan Kimball's wrap-up of the event can be found here.

Kimball's "What Would Luther Do?" ponderings are really very interesting, especially in light of the fact that the early Lutherans had an Emerging Church Movement of its own during Luther's reformation - and it wasn't Luther. Rather it was Luther's friend and colleague at the University of Wittenberg, Andreas Karlstadt.

During Luther's 1521 exile to the Wartburg Castle, Karlstadt took temporary leadership of the reformation movement, and implemented many Emergent methods nearly five centuries before the current Emerging movement.

Karlstadt made radical changes to the cultural landscape of worship. He abolished the traditional vestments in favor of casual attire - which he wore while officiating over worship. He distanced himself from academic life, stressing his lived-out life among the ordinary people. He rejected being called "Reverend Father" and instead sought to be addressed more casually as "Brother Andreas." He made radical changes to the liturgy and music of the church. He removed the Apocryphal books from the Bible. He also rejected both infant baptism and a belief in the Real Presence in Holy Communion (both of which mirror the beliefs of the vast majority of modern day Emergents). Furthermore, Karlstadt certainly had his finger on the pulse of youth, given his marriage at the age of 38 to a 15-year old girl.

Karlstadt was really the father of the Emerging Church Movement in Lutheranism. So, What Did Luther Do?

Luther was so outraged, he returned from exile and removed Karlstadt from the ministry. Martin Luther was no radical, no revolutionary, no Emergent Leader.

Luther (and those who were later pinned with the name Lutheran) never abolished the Mass. They believe Jesus is physically present in the elements, that when the pastor consecrates the bread and wine, they are truly changed into the body and blood of Jesus. In fact, Luther condemned those who did not believe this as heretics - refusing even to consider them Christians! I don't agree with Luther on this, but I don't think Luther should be misrepresented by those he himself would have not considered to be fellow Christians.

Luther retained the traditional priestly vestments. He retained the traditional address of the pastor as "Father." In areas where it was politically and ecclesiastically possible, the Lutherans retained the bishop-priest-deacon division of the Office of the Holy Ministry - including the apostolic succession of bishops (as is the case to this day in Lutheran Scandinavia, Russia, the Baltics, and Africa). Luther (and Lutherans) believe in baptismal regeneration (and thus infant baptism) and the pastor's authority to hear confessions and forgive sins by delegated authority of Jesus Himself.

Whereas Karlstadt eliminated the elevation of the consecrated host in the Mass, Luther restored it. Whereas Karlstadt called for the abolition of statues and traditional art and music in the church, Luther restored them. True enough, Luther translated the Mass into German (as well as the Bible) and wrote hymnody, but these hymns were not (as is often asserted by urban legend) drinking tunes or bawdy pop songs. Luther's hymnody is dignified and rich, to the point where Johann Sebastian Bach arranged many of his melodies.

And while Luther translated the Mass into German, Latin Masses were still being sung in Lutheran territories into the 18th century. Until American Lutherans began to speak English, Lutheran Bibles contained the Apocrypha. Lutherans (following Luther's example) were not anti-tradition. In fact, the Lutheran default position on tradition was to retain it wherever possible. The only time tradition was jettisoned was when such traditions were contrary to scripture and the Gospel. The Lutheran Mass was virtually identical to the Roman Mass - with the exception being the part of the Roman Mass known as the canon. Luther greatly simplified the canon for the sake of the Gospel. other than that, Luther retained the sign of the cross, genuflecting, bowing, and nearly every other traditional ceremony. The early Lutherans also retained the Hail Mary prayer, the Feast of the Assumption of Mary, belief in the perpetual virginity of Mary, and even belief in the immaculate conception. While these did not have the force of canon law among the Lutherans, it's simply a fact that the Lutheran fathers believed in these doctrines and taught them. Early portraits of Lutheran leaders show them clutching rosaries.

Finally, the very heart of the Emerging movement is an accommodation of postmodern epistemology. In other words, there is a great deal of subjectivity in the Emerging movement. It is often hostile to "denominationalism." Lutheranism, by definition, draws an objective boundary around the faith in terms of specific confessed doctrine. Lutherans, by definition, confess a particular collection of historic creeds and confessions known as the Book of Concord, and do so without reservation. Such confession is seen as terribly constraining by the Emerging movement, and we are told again and again that such "denominationalism" is a stumbling block to "reaching the youth."

In my own experience as a high school campus pastor, I was admonished by a school board member: "The kids don't need all that Book of Concord stuff. They just need to know that Jesus loves them." There is an increasing belief among Lutherans that confession and doctrine are antithetical to evangelizing young people.

For all of the current LCMS "Ablaze" rhetoric about "saving the lost" and the need to use innovations for the sake of people who are going to hell, there is a rather obvious elephant in the parlor. Many LCMS leaders (at synod and district levels) are almost panic stricken at the decline in numbers within the LCMS. Kimball cites that Terry Ditmer (the Youth Ministry leader of the Missouri Synod) opened the symposia by presenting numbers and statistics about teens in the LCMS. I believe the real underlying panic is not so much hellfire as it is a "brand loyalty" and "shrinking market" approach to Lutheranism, specifically the corporate entity known as the Missouri Synod. The LCMS is treated as though it were a corporation with a product to sell, and is in need of some serious changes in marketing philosophy in order to retain its place, let alone expand, in the market. This explains the increasing reliance on corporate strategies and the constant citations and endorsements of books about business marketing and CEO-style leadership being endorsed by LCMS officials. I believe this shows a lack of faith in the Holy Spirit as well as a flawed ecclesiology. The "market share" approach to evangelism always appeals to the whims and vagaries of the current culture.

But Christianity has always been counter-cultural. The early martyrs of the Christian faith were willing to die for their confession, their objective confession of Jesus Christ. They did not seek rapprochement with the larger culture - not even for the sake of making the Christian faith appeal to outsiders. They did not try to change the nature of Christian worship to appeal to Pagan teens, nor did they strive to reinvent the terrible and horrendous image of Christianity for the sake of marketing the faith to non-believers. Instead, they went to the stake and the arena singing countercultural hymns and dying faithfully to the bafflement of the non-believer. But look what happened. The Holy Spirit worked through these countercultural "martyral" Christians. Mission work was done by standing against the anti-Christian culture, not by making the Church look more and more Pagan, nor by watering down doctrine and practice into a subjective mush for the sake of marketing and appeal to youth.

I believe the Emerging Church Movement is completely contrary to the Lutheran tradition and confession of the catholic faith. The two are like oil and water. Lutheran leaders who see the "success" of the Emerging movement and strive to do the same things in our context will ultimately follow Karlstadt's path. What did Karlstadt do? He left the Lutheran confession of the faith and served as a Reformed minister who was quite open to many Anabaptist doctrines (Luther condemned the Reformed as not even Christian, while the Lutheran confessions explicitly condemn many Anabaptist doctrines as false).

I don't agree with Luther's position that those who confess Christ and yet deny the Real Presence in the Holy Sacrament of the Altar are not Christians. However, I do think a lot of Christians - including many in the Emerging Church Movement - are deluding themselves when they try to wrap themselves in the mantle of Martin Luther. I also believe Lutheran dabblers in Emergism are on a path away from the confession of the faith per our confessional symbols, and have chosen to embrace Karlstadt over Luther. I believe the Lutheran path is to stand for the Gospel, to cling to tradition where it does not contradict the Gospel, and to avoid the ebb and flow of an ever changing cultural landscape, instead clinging to the unchanging confession of the immutable Triune God, into whose name we have been regenerated through Baptism, and by whose grace we have communion with Him in the Mass.

Anything else is, by definition, not Lutheran.

Sermon: Epiphany

6 January 2007 at Salem Lutheran Church, Gretna, LA
Text: Matt 2:1-12 (Isa 60:1-6, Eph 3:1-12)

In the name of + Jesus. Amen.

Today, the thirteenth day after the Festival of our Lord’s nativity, the day after the Twelfth Day of Christmas, is called “Epiphany.” Today begins our Carnival season, in which we feast with joy, celebrate, proclaim anew the joys of the Lord with parades and festivals – even as we prepare to bid “farewell to the flesh” (which is what the Latin behind “Carnival” means) with the coming of the fasting of Lent.

In the midst of this world’s cycles of feasting and fasting, in the ebb and flow of this existence of joy and sorrow, of life and death, of the pulsing rhythm of celebration and somberness – this day and season of Epiphany is a time of joy.

“Epiphany” is a Greek word that means a shining of light, a revealing, a manifestation, or a showing. For when we are in darkness, we can’t see anything. Nothing can be shown to us. We are lost and don’t even know where to go to get out of the darkness. But once the light shines, the truth is revealed to us in the blink of an eye, and we can be shown where to go.

In His creation of heaven and earth, on the first day, the first thing God created was light. The primordial darkness of chaos and disorder gave way to the Creator’s plan of revelation and order. Light is something to be shared, for God doesn’t need light to see, but we, His humble creatures, do. The Lord God gives His creatures light so He can reveal Himself and His good and glorious creation to them.

But we sinners, we who have corrupted that creation, prefer darkness to light. Why? Because our sinful deeds can be hidden in darkness. The true distorted image of the monsters we have become thanks to sin is exposed by light. But in His mercy and grace, the Light of the World, God of God, Light of Light, has come to take away our ugliness, to restore our beauty, to replace chaos with order, and to bring us once again happily into the light.

“Arise, shine, for your light has come!” proclaims Isaiah. This is good news. God’s glory has come, not to burn out our eyes, not to destroy us with His brightness, but rather to bring us out of our lonely darkness, “then you shall see and become radiant, and your heart will swell with joy.” For the promised Light to come into our midst doesn’t merely expose our sin, but rather burns it away in a radiant blast of restoration and healing, so that we creatures, originally made in the image and likeness of God, may once more shine with His glory as His icons and children.

This prophecy of Isaiah concerning the Light was set into motion when the Light of the Word was ignited in the lamp of the Blessed Virgin Mary’s womb. This glorious Light could not be suppressed, as even the creation itself shone, manifested by a star that led the magi to the Christ child, who was to become a beacon of hope in a dark and dismal world.

But once more, there are those who thrive on darkness, whose deeds are wicked, they who see light as a threat of exposure of their evil. King Herod was one such friend of darkness. The star which shone upon our Lord Jesus Christ, the King of Kings, also illuminated the false claims to the throne by the tyrant Herod and his parasitic family. This Light was no friend of Herod’s, and Herod sought to extinguish the Light.

But the Light was the hope of the world – not merely the hope of Israel. For as Isaiah preaches: “The wealth of the Gentiles shall come to you… gold and incense, and they shall proclaim the praises of the Lord.” The magi, Gentiles from far away, brought these royal and priestly gifts, created things of beauty to be laid at the feet of the almighty Creator who has come to His creation as an all-humble Child. Gold, the precious metal of royalty, and incense, the beautiful aroma of priestly sacrifice and worship of Him who is surrounded in the smoky clouds of holy prayer, along with myrrh, a perfume of anointing, a symbol that this boy King and Priest is also the Christ, the promised Messiah, the “Light to Lighten the Gentiles and the glory of the people of Israel.”

On this day when the Magi came to worship before the King, the false king and his master Satan would not succeed in bringing about the darkness. The Light has been manifested in a glorious epiphany to Jew and Gentile alike, uncreated Light beaming within a newly enlightened creation. Thirty years later, the darkness would make a grab at this Light, and would even cover the earth for three hours while Light and darkness would make battle – but darkness will be forever destroyed, as the Book of Revelation, itself an epiphany of the Light of the World, reveals to us that in the New Creation, we, those redeemed by water and the Word, those enlightened by the Lamb: “will see His face, and His name will be on their foreheads. And night will be no more. They will need no light of lamp or sun, for the Lord God will be their light, and they will reign forever and ever.”

This is what Paul means when he proclaims: “it has now been revealed by the Spirit to His holy apostles and prophets, that the Gentiles should be fellow heirs, of the same body, and partakers of His promise in Christ through the Gospel.”

The magi, wise men who did not belong to the race of Israel, were nonetheless given a revelation of the Light, and their darkness was removed by the shining of the Christ child’s face, by the epiphany of “the manifold wisdom of God.” The Light of the World has come for all, for Jew and Gentile, “for us men and for our salvation” – “according to the eternal purpose which He accomplished in Christ Jesus our Lord, in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through faith in Him.”

Dear brothers and sisters, let us glory in this light. Let us not fear the light, and God forbid that we should revel in darkness and seek to extinguish this Light. When the light reveals our sin, let us use this light to examine ourselves, to confess our sins, to repent, and to once more glory in the warm, radiant light of our Lord.

Let the Word of the Lord continue to bring us to the Word made flesh, even as the glorious star led the wise men in their pilgrimage. Anything that leads us away from Christ only leads to darkness, to the cold, lonely, and frightening prison of our broken and distorted sinful nature. But when we are led to where our Lord Jesus is present – in the epiphany of Holy Communion, in the manifestation of His preached Word, in the bosom of our Mother the Church, which cradles our dear Lord’s body just as His virginal mother cradled Him when the magi followed His star and presented Him gifts – we can bask in the glow and warmth of His holy light, without fear of the ugliness of our sins – for they have been taken away.

And though we still observe the epic struggle between good and evil, the constant back and forth of night and day, of sin and repentance, of the glory of goodness and the terror of evil, the cycle alternating between feast and fast – we know that the time of this up and down, back and forth, is coming to an end.

The epiphany of our Lord Jesus, His glorious manifestation of light to the magi, and to us, in this vale of tears, is but a glimpse into the eternity to come when darkness will forever be extinguished, when daylight will never yield to the night, when the “Morningstar… fair and bright” will “transport us to that happy place beyond all tears and sinning.”

To You, O Lord, all glory be
For this Your blest epiphany;
To God, whom all His hosts adore,
And Holy Spirit evermore. Amen.

In the name of the Father and of the + Son and of the Holy Spirit.” Amen.

High Def, Low Quality

The day had finally come for the old Hollywood Family television to go into retirement. A relic from the last millennium, the old faithful set was beginning to dim, its heavy glass cathode-ray tube not quite what it once was back in the days of Grunge Rock and the first George Bush.

Father and Mrs. Hollywood resolved to abstain from swapping any Christmas gifts in lieu of buying a flat screen TV this year. Our congregation, in a very sneaky fashion, right under my nose, took up a secret collection during the Divine Service to give the Hollywoods a monetary gift for Christmas. And my goodness! How generous the people of Salem Evangelical Lutheran Church truly are! We were absolutely stunned. And knowing that some of my parishioners are reading, thank you so much!

We bought a brand new Westinghouse 26-inch LCD High Definition TV from Target (as we call it in these parts: Chez Tar-ZHAY).

Oh my goodness!

Not only is the picture beyond belief, but we get more channels! We don't have cable, but the trusty rabbit ears draw in a lot of TV stations. It's like "poor man's cable". We even get Telemundo - and it is every bit as melodramatic and cheesy as the SNL parodies with Horatio Sanz.

I now get three channels of Religious Wacko TV (a must for Lutheran pastors - we all seem entranced by this stuff). I can watch Benny Hinn pretty much on demand. I also saw a Pentecostal preacher preaching a "sermon" about paying bills and relying on ourselves to get out of debt and not seek co-signers for loans. Good advice. What it has to do with Jesus, the Church, the Christian faith etc. is beyond me. Lot's of Ay-MANs and raised hands, though. One lady started literally running in place and making funny faces. And no, this was not a commercial for a new exercise gadget. This kind of thing never happens in congregations that use the Nineteen By God Forty One Lutheran Hymnal - I can tell you that!

Hey, what's up with Benny Hinn's new outfit? When he's on camera, he wears this black Nehru jacket with a white shirt underneath. It has a set of buttons down the center. On first glance, it looks like a traditional Roman cassock! Gads! And when he is "preaching," the "cassock" is all white - like the one worn by the pope. I was disappointed, however, that this time there was no blowing on crowds of people turning them into a quivering mass of flesh. That trick is always good for a few laughs. However, this time he was in Latin America and had an interpreter prancing along with him, step for step, in a sort-of Pentecostal tango. He even managed to translate Benny's "speaking in tongues" gibberish into his own non-Spanish gibberish. Now there's a trick that not even the Holy Ghost has pulled off - English "tongues" to Spanish "tongues" that nobody can interpret anyway. Impressive! Even better than Telemundo!

There is also a woman "preacher" named "Pastor" Melissa Scott, who actually wears a clerical collar and lectures using the Greek text of the Bible. I came to learn that she is the widow of the famous Dr. Gene Scott of California. The Granola State, of course.

I was introduced to her dead husband Dr. Gene Scott's TV antics by one of my professors - an aficionado of wacky religious television programming (as nearly every Lutheran seminary professor is, whether he admits it or not). It seems that the late Dr. Scott had a legitimate Ph.D. and was an ordained minister of the Assemblies of God. He had a TV ministry in which his eccentric personality was front and center. He would drink "adult beverages" and smoke cigars on camera. He would use mild profanity and threaten to stop the show unless donations be phoned in right then and there. He wore funny hats and glasses and would engage in irreverent banter with the staff. He was a little like the late-night movie hosts, and often "preached" about UFOs and the Great Pyramid as having relevance to end-times prophecies. Deliciously wacky!

It seems that at some point, he brought in bikini girls to put in the front row of the studio as "eye candy." One of them, a porn star who used the pseudonym Barbi Bridges (whose real name was Melissa), became quite friendly with the preacher who was old enough to be her father. She ended up becoming his fourth wife, and inherited the "ministry" from him upon his death. To quote the Church father Tertullian: "I believe it because it is absurd." You can't make stuff like this up.

Anyway, this is where "Pastor" Melissa Scott comes in. Upon her husband's death, she declared herself a "pastor" and took control of all the "church's" assets (the congregation claims to be downtown Los Angeles' largest Protestant church). She apparently leads a pretty extravagant life and has some of her husband's quirky traits when teaching - though she seems to lack his brilliance.

An Anglican deacon from Tulsa has a blog article about her "prowess" with the Greek language that you can read here. What he observes is absolutely correct, and exposes "Pastor" Melissa as a fraud, a phony intellectual, a false prophet, and a scam artist.

Later on in my surf through religious TV-land, a well-heeled Oral Roberts, Jr. was lecturing about (what else?) money, offerings, and "first fruit giving" to his ministry. A flashing "$100" appeared at the bottom of the screen. On the new TV, this looked like a Las Vegas marquee. Anyway, the Reverend Roberts was exegetically explaining a passage from Genesis (4:3ff) in which Cain's grain offering is not accepted by God, whereas Abel's offering of blood was accepted. Roberts opined that Cain's offering was refused because he dragged his feet about it, instead of giving promptly. He argued that the text which reads "In the course of time..." (Gen 4:3) could be interpreted as "Whenever he got around to it..." Of course, if God is to accept our donations to Oral Roberts, we need to be quick about it. Otherwise, God might not bribe us with blessings, and Roberts might miss a Mercedes payment. Did I just type that last part out loud?

Interesting exegesis. The Hebrew word used here is a form of the verb HYH, translated as "to come to pass" or "to become." My Hebrew is very rusty, so I did the "Old Iowa Trick" (thank you Dr. Scaer) and checked the LXX (Septuagint Greek) translation for a little help. Lo and behold, the Greek text of Gen 4:3 reads: "kai egeneto..." - a common New Testament expression that is often translated: "And it came to pass that..." or "And it happened that..." and so forth. This is just the narrator's way of moving the story along and has nothing to do with Cain's lack of speed in "showing God the money."

Bunch of liars, charlatans and thieves! And then there are the secular shows which are about as heathen as the "Christian" programs!

I was flipping through the channels and caught a few minutes of Boston Legal. I have never seen this show before. There was a nun serving as a courtroom interpreter (which would never happen in the real world). The witness is speaking Spanish. The nun translates his testimony using words that can be interpreted in a sexual way. She goes on and on using a word that is often applied to male genitalia. It would have been very funny if I were in fourth grade, I suppose. Do adults really laugh at stuff like that? Later in the program, a lawyer gives a passionate monologue about how abstinence education kills people, how the condom is the greatest invention in the last 2,000 years (Mr. Edison, please pick up the white courtesy phone...), and how schools need to distribute condoms - all the while the camera was focusing on a 15 year old girl while the word "condom" was repeated ad infinitum. The judge was a stereotypical comic prude. This was pure, unadulterated political advocacy and - especially when combined with the earlier scene with the nun - an explicit attack on conservative Catholic Christianity and traditional Christian values. I can only wonder if Nancy Pelosi will be calling for the "Fairness Doctrine" in response. But I won't hold my breath for Congress to act.

During the program, I continued to surf the channels. I landed on a Family Guy episode that was using the very same word used by the nun in Boston Legal that is a double entendre for male sex organs. It was even more un-funny the second time around. Now, we can't blame this lack of creativity on the writers' strike, since these were already written before. This is all they've got, I guess. I guess that's the price we pay for rampant illiteracy and hands-off parenting.

Then there was the visit of pop singer Justin Timberlake on Jay Leno's Tonight Show that featured a skit in which Timberlake cuts a hole in a box, puts in his male genitalia, and gives the box as a present. Leno presented Timberlake with a long list of various slang terms for the male organ that he could get away with on network TV. Again, do adults really find this funny? (And what's that sound coming from Johnny Carson's grave?).

There is a lot of low quality in high def. And just think, if I had cable, I could actually pay for even more crap!

However, football really looks good in high definition. Really. I expect overthrown passes to fly right through the screen and knock out my window! Wow! The news is also now broadcast in high def - and it is impressive to the eye. I can actually see what the New Orleans fugitives look like when Crime-stoppers shows their mugs. Our movies (including Lion Boy's Spiderman and Blue's Clues DVDs) all look a lot better than on the old ever-dimmer CRT-based television from the last century. And the HBO Rome series - again, wow! Not for children though - especially in high def. Severed heads and full-frontal nudity are much more explicit in the new format. But so are the magnificent costumes, sets, and intense acting. Phenomenal!

Like anything else, technology can be both good and bad. But if you're going to watch TV, you might as well see it in its full glory - especially when Benny Hinn is doing his magic tricks and the porn-star preacher is messing up the Greek alphabet. Besides, next year, the old TV won't work anyway.

Just don't expect televangelists to get any more orthodox and less fraudulent in the new format.

Do we sleep in our Clericals?

While attending seminary at Concordia - Fort Wayne, I learned about our school's "high church" reputation - which gave rise to a lot of silly stereotypes. One of them is that we sleep in our "clericals" (black shirts with white collars).

On one occasion, we had some fellow seminarians from our sister seminary in St. Louis visiting us at Fort Wayne. One of them was sincerely stunned to see seminarians who were not wearing collars. He was very pleasantly surprised to see this stereotype was not true. Of course, I was wearing my clericals during his visit, and was puzzled why he thought clericals were a bad thing.

The clerical collar is the pastor's best "evangelism tool." When I walk around my neighborhood, everybody knows that I am one of Jesus's Guys. If they want prayer, if the have a question regarding the faith, if they need spiritual care - they know exactly where to go. I get stopped at the gas station, at the grocery store, at restaurants, at the airport - anywhere I may be found in clerical attire - and they know I am a Christian clergyman.

They also know that I am some kind of priest. There is a sense of gravitas associated with the clerical uniform. They know I'm not a televangelist, nor a screaming stereotype of an entertainment-style preacher. I don't preside over a coffee-shop "church," but rather I'm the type who hears confessions and gives Last Rites. They would not know this if I were in "mufti" or wearing a trendy golf shirt with the Corporate Logo of the Lutheran Church - Missouri Synod and the Ablaze!(tm) trademark on the front pocket.

By virtue of the public nature of clerical attire, they also know I'm not ashamed of Jesus, nor of the Gospel, nor of the vocation I - unworthy as I am - hold. If they encounter me near my home and church, I can let them know where I serve and when our services are. And if an emergency happens, I can generally pass through hospitals, and can have access with police, military, and other emergency personnel.

Do we sleep in our clericals? Not usually, but I did on Christmas day. After five sermons in five days (four Masses, one funeral, as well as several hospital and shut-in calls, as well as a death-bed visit), I was pretty tired come Christmas. After Christmas morning Divine Service, the Hollywood family visited with a neighbor (who is not a parishioner of mine) for Christmas lunch, after which, we went home.

After assisting Lion Boy with the opening of presents, I flopped into bed - still clad in my clerical attire. I awoke after three hours. Furthermore, I was not wearing the "tab" collar, but rather the very constraining Anglican "dog collar." But I slept like a baby.

I guess some stereotypes are true after all!

Anyway, some of Fr. Hollywood's readers might enjoy a satirical blog out there called "Priestmanship". Here is a post regarding clerical dress.

And, no, I do not write this blog. I have nothing to do with it. I have to say that because, for some reason, every time a blog associated with Lutheranism that is satirical or is some kind parody appears, I'm accused of being the author. I think I may know who the Priestman is, but my lips are sealed. But it isn't me, so stop the gossip right now!

I would point out, however, that the typical rules regarding clerical attire don't apply in New Orleans. First of all, we are Southerners - with all the baggage that carries. Secondly, we are Louisianans - in the francophone "biretta belt" of the South. Third, we're New Orleanians. We have to drive many miles north to get the the southernmost point of Mississippi. We live in a city known for a strange and seemingly contradictory mix of traditionalism and individual eccentricity.

It is perfectly acceptable for a Lutheran pastor to walk around the neighborhood (or even ride a bicycle) clad in a Roman cassock with a rope cincture tied around his waist. The response will either be 1) nobody will bat an eye - this is New Orleans, or 2) one will be greeted (in the utterly unique "Yat" accent) with a "How ya doin', fawthuh?"

I would also add that the rope cincture is helpful in New Orleans as a handy aid for twisting off bottle tops.

"But You're Smart!"

More evidence of our culture's hatred of motherhood, family, marriage, children, and (especially) the holy and honorable vocation of wife.

This was written by a 19-year old Christian girl. Notice that even setting one's sights on becoming a nurse is considered menial and demeaning! Can you just imagine a world where all children become doctors and lawyers? Scary!

This young lady's anecdote calls to mind a similar story from our Traditionalist Roman Catholic friends who live on a Texas farm. One of their very bright, educated, cultured daughters - who was a pre-teen at the time - was asked by someone about what she wanted to do when she grew up. Her reply was something to the effect of "get married, have children, and raise horses." The interrogator was taken aback and asked: "Don't you want to be a doctor or lawyer?" The girl's answer was brilliant and reflected the family's confident counterculturalism: "No, that's what YOU want me to be."

Hollywood baby goes Hollywood?

A little girl baptized by Father Hollywood (a Beanie baby?) "went Hollywood" last year as the 2007 spokesmodel and cover girl for Graco (she was selected by an internet poll).

Little Grace is shown at left with her mother Carole, a former teacher at Salem Lutheran School.

I had neglected to mention this before, but was reminded today when I ran across a thank you card from Carole for officiating at Grace's baptism. Hey, any excuse to brag on my parishioners will do!

Unfortunately, Mom, dad, and baby moved a good distance away after Hurricane Katrina - which was a huge blow to our parish as they were such a big part of our Salem community. They live so far away that they really can't be part of our community as they were before. So, I don't know how long I will ultimately get to brag about having them as my parishioners - but we all know such glory is fleeting anyway. However, the glory of Holy Baptism is eternal, for Baby Grace has been given eternal life by Divine Grace.

Grace and her parents will reign not just for a year as representatives of a company, but will rule unto the ages of ages as children of the King of the universe!

A Culty New Year?

For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables. - 2 Tim 4:3-4

This evening, I received a sales call from "Bridge Publications" - which is the publishing company of the Scientology cult. This, in spite of the fact that my home phone number is registered with the National Do Not Call Registry - with whom I promptly filed a complaint.

Yesterday, followers of a cult leader named Yisrayl Hawkins (real name "Bill" - which is somehow just too bourgeois for a cult leader, not nearly as sexy as "Yisrayl") left a newsletter under the wipers of my car (which seems to be a violation of the seventh commandment to me, messing around with parts of my automobile without my consent). The Hawkins cult ("The House of Yahweh", so-called) is one of the many groups trying to predict the date of the end of the world. Yawn. Like other cults and sects - such as the Jehovah's Witnesses - Hawkins has failed in several predictions already, and yet amazingly, still has devotees. An article on Wikipedia has all the details. Pathetic, really.

Interestingly, both Scientology and the Hawkins cult are both forms of Gnosticism - based on the Greek word "gnosis" meaning "knowledge."

The Scientologists claim to have knowledge not revealed to anyone else - other than the science fiction author L. Ron Hubbard. Interestingly, "science" (and Scientology) is a derivative of the Latin word "scio" meaning "I know."

Hawkins' "House of Yahweh" cult is also Gnostic - relying on a kind of "decoding" of biblical texts. Hawkins claims to have found scriptural evidence regarding "global warming" as a payment for human sins. In the newsletter left on my car, there is no mention of Jesus's crucifixion as payment for human sins.

Hawkins' technique is clearly Gnostic. He cites Scripture in a piecemeal fashion, while insisting that God is only to be called "Yahweh" and Jesus is only to be called "Yahshua." By using a sort-of lexicon of code-words, he is implying that he "knows" something that the rest of the world doesn't. He also uses altered names of some (but not all!) biblical books. For instance, He refers to Isaiah as "Isayah"; Matthew is "Mattithyah"; James as "Yaaqob"; John as "Yahchanan" - while other books inexplicably retain their traditional English names, e.g. Revelation, Luke, and Hebrews. In other words, although New Testament books are written in Greek - Hawkins renames some of the books with Hebraicized names, while retaining the English names for the others. Why he changes the name of Isaiah isn't clear - nor is the spelling of his adopted name "Yisrayl" (if we transliterate the Hebrew into English, it would look like "Yisrael." I don't know where he gets the second "Y").

Hawkins also reveals the shocking (shocking, I tell you!) revelation that December 25 is not Jesus's birthday, and that Jesus actually rose some time in the middle of the night before Easter Sunday morning (of course, we historic, traditionalist Christians have been celebrating Easter Vigil after Sundown Saturday night since the earliest centuries of the Church, and never refer to December 25 as "Jesus's Birthday" but rather the Festival of the Nativity).

The argument over how to spell our blessed Lord's name and the use of God's sacred Hebrew name is absolutely silly - since neither "Yahweh" nor "Yashua" are Hebrew. These letters do not exist in the Hebrew alphabet. These are transliterations, not the original Hebrew. Furthermore, the proper transliteration into English of the Divine Name is YHWH - since the Hebrew of the Old Testament lacks vowels. Nobody knows which vowels come before the two H's. Finally, we speak English. The New Testament was written in Greek. The Greek name transliterated as "Iesous" (or perhaps as "IHSOUC") is translated into modern English as "Jesus." This is no different than my name being "Larry" in English, "Lars" in Swedish, "Laurent" in French, and "Larrius" or "Laurentius" in Latin. I can't even imagine what my name would be in Japanese! There is nothing to be gained by refusing to use the English translation and standard transliteration of the New Testament's Greek and substituting an invention of one's own. This is a red herring. This has nothing to do with the Christian faith. This is part of the Gnostic appeal.

What is more interesting about Hawkins' newsletter is not so much what is there, but rather what is not there. There is nothing about the cross, the atonement, the forgiveness of sins, faith, nor anything incarnational or sacramental. There is no "we preach Christ crucified" to be found. There is nothing at all about faith. There is a lot of law - much of which has to be wrung out of the texts by clever hermeneutics.

Cults - be they Scientology, the House of Yahweh, the Bible Codes, the various Messianic sects and cults, or any other claim to "secret knowledge" - all focus on one very narrow part of Christian doctrine and go off on a tangent. They become bogged down in details while missing the overarching biblical narrative.

Christian doctrine is biblical doctrine - and the Bible is not a collection of data, of proof texts, of unrelated factoids. Rather it is a unified narrative, a "story." It has an overarching structure. It begins in paradise, ends in paradise, and has a middle that involves a journey. The journey is a struggle to "get back home." This is mankind's story. There is the struggle between good and evil, and a Hero. The Bible is the classic template for all literature. Not because the Bible is just another story, but rather from this biblical history of fallen man in search of Paradise Restored comes the template for all literature! I discovered this from our friends in Toronto who originated New Moves - the approach to literacy being used by Salem Lutheran School. All epics, all mythology, all really good fiction, involve (at least on some level) this universal human theme.

Without seeing the "big picture" - the overarching theme of Holy Scripture, a person is left with a myriad of unrelated facts that make no sense at all. But in seeing the big picture, in treating the Word of God as an organic whole, there is a unifying principle - a thesis that ties together sin, death, sacrifice, incarnation, redemption, re-creation, and life. In relating Genesis to Revelation, a cogent picture emerges - a picture of our Lord Jesus Christ, His mission, His ministry, and His kingdom.

That overarching theme of the biblical narrative is known as "the Gospel" - the Good News of redemption. This is the thing the cults lack, being sadly bogged down in minutia designed to imply that the cult leader has some secret knowledge (gnosis) - when in fact, he has no knowledge of the Good News at all. He is a pathetic "man behind the curtain" seeking the unquestioning loyalty of personal devotees.

There is nothing hidden in the Bible - unless you consider something "hidden in plain sight" to be hidden. The words of Scripture are right there. The Gospel is not locked into codes or lurking about in mysterious Greek or Hebrew. The Gospel can (and most certainly is) translatable into every human tongue. There is much (very much!) to be gained by reading the Bible in the original languages (just as any other translated work is best read in the original) - but there are no lurking secrets. Any ambitious, disciplined, and reasonably intelligent person can study Biblical Greek and Hebrew, either in a classroom or on one's own, and can certainly benefit greatly. No biblical teacher or theologian has any secret revelation - neither from God nor from a Gnostic reading of the Bible. Any person can learn the original languages and read, just as any literate person can benefit from reading the Word of God.

Our Lord Jesus is called in John 1:1 "the Word." Words convey a message. Words mean things. Words are not secret codes and ciphers only known to those with special gnosis or scientia. This is what separates the Christian faith from cults. The Christian faith is laid out (revealed, revelatus) before you in the revelation of Holy Scripture - not hidden in secret codes only to be unlocked by some self-declared prophet with secret knowledge.

Well, I guess we've been warned:

For false christs and false prophets will rise and show great signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect. (Matt 24:24).

Even so, come, Lord Jesus! (Rev 22:20).